


Aliens Made Them Do It

by Tortellini



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alien Invasion, Alien Sex, Alien/Human Relationships, Aliens, Army, Bad Jokes, Based on a Tumblr Post, Best Friends, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dirty Jokes, Epic Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Humor, Inspired By Tumblr, Investigations, Jokes, M/M, Male Friendship, Paranormal Investigators, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Romantic Friendship, Ryan Bergara Being an Idiot, Scared Ryan Bergara, Shane Madej Being an Idiot, Shane Madej Is A Dick, Shane Madej Loves Ryan Bergara, Skeptic Shane Madej, Wordcount: 100-500, area 51
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 11:25:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13703484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tortellini/pseuds/Tortellini
Summary: Ryan and Shane discover Area 51...and beyond.Oneshot/drabble





	Aliens Made Them Do It

"This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved, we take a look into the long wondered about Area 51. For over multiple decades it's been rumored about that the US government has decided to shield extra terrestrials from the public eye. Located on a highly classified remote detachment of Edwards Air Force Base, the facility is within Lincoln County, Nevada.

What exactly is Area 51 used for? Mere top secret military training? Post-Cold War dealings with Russia?

Or something more mysterious?

And if the latter is true, why have intergalactic beings been kept here of all places? To keep them from the public eye and in doing so keep the panic away? Or something more sinister--to do experiments on them in order for us to better understand just what exactly life is like out there...?"

* * *

"Okay!" Ryan Bergara said as he got off the plane and into the hot desert air. Honestly he was used to California so this wasn't that much worse. Though to be fair, California had that nice ocean breeze and Nevada definitely did not. Which wasn't saying Nevada wasn't nice though! Anyway. "Shane, isn't this exciting? This is something we can both agree on for once. Aliens."

Shane wrinkled his nose as he got off the plane behind him. "You know how I feel about alien abduction stories. They're all bullshit."

Ryan didn't agree with that, but he nodded anyway, because this wasn't just about abductions. "Area 51."

That made Shane pause. "Okay to be fair, it does make me a little curious. Not saying I believe in them--" he said quickly. 

"'I want to believe!'"

"Ryan, shut up and stop quoting The X Files."

Ryan *wheezed*. Shane ignored him and continued. "--but. It's weird, man. I know there's something there, even if it's not aliens." 

That was probably the best they were gonna get right now. They were still a half hour away from their destination. 

* * *

"Okay," Ryan said again. They had finally arrived at their destination, as Google Maps had so elegantly put it. "So we've arrived at Area 51." The two of them weren't actually inside of the base because then they would be arrested. But they were close enough. Maybe later they'd get closer to try and talk to someone who worked there, or get a legitimate tour or something. As long as it was legal. 

He and Shane were walking around the fence. "So Shane, this is Area 51."

"Beautiful," Shane deadpanned. 

"This is where supposedly there's aliens." Ryan continued. 

"The aliens live here?"

He nodded. "Yeah, you could say that--the aliens live here. And then over there there's Area 69 where--okay I'm gonna stop." Ryan tried not to laugh at his own joke. 

Shane didn't stop though. "What? Where they what, Ryan?"

"...where the aliens fuck."

Hopefully they wouldn't end up getting arrested for saying something like that. Well, too late now though.


End file.
